Coincidence?
by Trixxification
Summary: In which Provenza is determined to get to the bottom of the mystery, but fails.
1. The Mystery

Provenza crossed his arms defiantly across his chest, slumping backward in to his chair. It wasn't fair. They didn't have an open case so there was no reason the team couldn't call it a day and take their paperwork to complete in the comfort of their own homes. It was only 4pm, what harm could leaving work an hour early do? Louie was sure that crushing other people's hopes and dreams was how the Wicked Witch gained her energy.

He sighed heavily, taking great pains in finding the perfect pen to write with, arranging his paperwork in as neat a pile as possible and positioning his chair at exactly the right angle to his desk. The Wicked Witch may be making him stay at work as long as she could, but she couldn't force him to work hard.

As Andy walked past, Provenza stopped doodling on his page. "Flynn. What d'ya say we stage a coup and leave early? Raydor can't physically stop us all."

Andy cocked an eyebrow, his lips set in a thin line, before he carefully spoke, "_Captain_ Raydor, has asked us to stay until clock-out time. Like it or not, she's the boss now, and we'll do what she wants."

Louie huffed, dismissing his friend by becoming uncharacteristically engrossed in his paperwork, and Andy continued his walk over to his own desk.

Provenza stared intently at his paperwork, focused on anything but. Why had Andy been so quick to defend The Ice Queen?

Deep down, Louie knew. He'd seen it begin way back when Raydor had begun investigating the team, he always knew when his best friend was attracted to a woman. He'd seen Andy's none too subtle glances at the Captain, had witnessed her tentative smiles in return. Heck, he could pinpoint the exact moment that Andy had fallen in love with Raydor, and he could see evidence of that moment every time he saw the red beanbag sitting on Andy's desk. His friend had it bad. And if he knew his friend half as well as he thought he did, he was positive that Andy was getting laid on at least a semi-regular basis. And if he was, then so too was Raydor – then why was she still being such a_ bitch_?

* * *

Louie waited until Andy had pulled out of his parking space and followed him out on to the road. He stayed two cars back and made sure to follow every turn that his friend did. He'd catch them out. Andy had visited the Captain's office before he left and through a gap in the blinds Louie had caught the way the two of them interacted, had sworn he lip-read the Captain say "I'll see you at my place after work". He would catch them out.

It wasn't until they'd hit the third set of traffic lights that Louie had realised they were still heading in the same direction as Andy's house. Did the Captain actually live close by? He was confused, but he kept up the chase.

When Andy pulled in to his own driveway, Provenza had no choice but to carry on down the road. When he reached the intersection he turned left and parked on the curb. Had he been wrong all along? For months he had seen the two of them arrive at work with barely a minute between them, he'd seen them both be happy and glowing on the same days, had witnessed the days when both were in a foul mood for no particular reason.

Could it all have been coincidence? He ran his hands through his aged hair and sighed heavily. Some detective he was. No wonder The Ice Queen was still such a bitch – she wasn't getting laid. Louie snorted to himself, of course she wasn't – who would want to go anywhere _near_ the job-stealing Wicked Witch?

* * *

Andy hung up the phone, smiling lightly to himself as he picked his keys up off the coffee table. He'd known Louie long enough to know when he was up to something – and when he'd noticed the older man following two cars behind him he had instead diverted his course and headed home. After watching the road for close to ten minutes, making sure his friend was well and truly gone; Andy locked up his home and headed back to his car.

He drove through the rush-hour traffic, heading toward the nicer part of the city, humming along to the music in his car. He'd outsmarted Provenza – not that it was hard, he knew Louie almost as well as he knew the back of his hand.

* * *

Andy pulled in to the parking space outside, exited the car and locked the doors. He made his way inside the building, into the elevator and pressed the floor button from memory.

When he reached his destination, he took a moment to straighten his tie, get rid of his toothpick and clear his throat. He rapped on the door and stood patiently.

No more than ten seconds later, Sharon opened her door and greeted him with a smile. He reciprocated, stepped inside and moved his arms to rest around her waist.

"Hey."

"Hey yourself," she replied, leaning in to rest her head on Andy's chest. "I guess Provenza feels like a real ass right now."

Andy chuckled, amused, "I like our little secret. And I _really_ like Louie all frustrated trying to figure it out."

Sharon looked up at him, a smirk playing on her lips. "As much as I enjoy having one over on the old grump, I think there are _much_ more interesting things to talk about on a date," she moved from Andy's embrace, taking one of his hands in hers, "Or," she grinned wickedly at him, "we could also _not_ talk" she said as she led him toward the bedroom.

* * *

On Monday morning, Louie could swear he'd seen Raydor and Andy in the parking garage together, lightly leaving a peck on one another's lips before separating. But he couldn't be sure. Maybe Sharon was dating some other silver-haired man in the LAPD – Lord knew there were a lot of them, especially in the higher ranks. He trudged in to the elevator, and punched the floor button harder than necessary. He'd get to the bottom of the mystery, he promised himself, _eventually._


	2. Definitely not a Coincidence

**Definitely not a Coincidence**

Provenza had spent that day at work pondering who on _earth _the captain could be dating if it wasn't Andy. Some may say he 'abused'his power to look up LAPD workers' files, but he preferred the term 'innocently and accidentally looked up a bunch of personnel files because he's old and hey, he can't work technology'. His efforts had been in vain. Every file he looked up had each silver-haired fox married, gay or too large to be Raydor's mystery man.

He sighed loudly, disappointed at the lack of fruits for his effort. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was 4:55PM – for once in his working life, he had managed to stay until clock out without trying to disappear early. Not that he was doing any _actual _police work.

Flynn tidied his pile of papers, stood up and tucked his chair under the desk. Provenza regarded him. He could tell his old friend was preoccupied, and usually he would want to make sure he was alright – but right now he was too mad at him for not letting him know he was seeing someone. Between the Captain having a mystery man and Andy having a mystery woman, Provenza found he had a lot of 'real' detecting work to get through.

The old man couldn't take it anymore. Hours of sitting at home and making plans, trying to figure out a plan of attack always led him to the same conclusion: it was time for an old-fashioned stake-out. He weighed the pros and cons, trying to decide who he should spy on first – if he caught the captain out, he could torment her with the information at work, maybe use it to bribe the ice queen a little, on the other hand, if he went for Andy first he could probably persuade him to chase after the captain's mystery man with him. After careful deliberation and a final chug of his beer, he decided to go with the latter.

Provenza checked his supplies one last time before turning the corner in to Andy's street. He had snacks, binoculars, and his gun and badge in case anyone questioned his prying around the neighbourhood. He only hoped that because it was Friday night, Andy would definitely have a date lined up.

As he turned the corner, driving slightly past Andy's house in the car he had borrowed from his ex-wife (she really was quite gullible, 'important police work' he had told her), he noticed that Andy wasn't home. Clue number one. Pulling on to the sidewalk and pulling the handbrake up, Provenza got himself organised. He opened the bag of Cheetos and held the binoculars in his right hand, ready to spy if a car pulled in to the street. He munched away, radio playing in the background scanning the street meticulously. He had the feeling he was in for a long night. He wished Andy was staking out with him, but he realised the absurdity of his desire.

A pair of headlights came around the corner, and Provenza jumped from his junkfood-fueled haze. He snatched up the binoculars that had fallen from his hand and fastened them to his eyes. It was Andy. He turned around in his seat, kneeling on it as easily as he could with his tired old knees. Clue number two, Andy wasn't alone. He watched the car pull in to the driveway, and the driver's side door open. Andy exited, moving around the front of the car and to the passenger side, opening the door for his mystery guest.

Sharon picked her handbag up from between her feet, tucking her mobile in to the pocket. She undid her seatbelt at the same time Andy opened the door for her. She started to get out, but Andy leaned in to the car, his head inches away from hers.

"Hey Shar, Proveza's ex-wife's car is parked just up the road. I think he might be doing a stake-out on me."

She raised her brows, a smirk playing on her lips. This was a chance for some fun. "Well, what do you want to do about it, Andy?"

He smiled at her, chuckling slightly before speaking. "The way I see it, we got a couple options. One, I get back in the car and drive you home. Two, we make a run for it inside. Three, since it's dark enough out and the streets are quiet, we could freak him out a bit, give him a little show."

Sharon cocked her head to the right, contemplating the choices. On one hand, she wasn't so sure she wanted to make their relationship public, but then again, Provenza might be entirely too shocked and disgusted to spread the word. On the other hand, she _really _wanted to teach him a lesson. She extended her right hand for Andy to help her out of the car, "Well, let's put on a show then," she grinned wickedly.

She snaked her arms around Andy's shoulders after he closed her door, stepping back to allow him to press her against the car. They smiled at one another, Andy's lips descending to hers, his tongue darting out to meet hers. His hips pushed against Sharon's, locking her impossibly closer between himself and the side of the car. One hand gripped her hair, the other tracing the outside of her left breast. His hand travelled further down, skimmed her hip and settled on her thigh, gripping it tightly and pulling her leg around his waist. She moaned deeply in to his mouth. Inwardly, he smirked – he'd had a feeling that there was an exhibitionist side to her. His mouth left hers, wandering along her jaw line, tracing her neck and coming to suck on her pulse point.

"Andy, we need to go inside."

He removed his mouth from her neck and gently lowered her leg again. He looked at her quizzically. "Sorry, I didn't mean to take it too far."

She smiled at him, running her fingers through his hair. "Don't be sorry," she husked, "I was enjoying it – but perhaps a little _too _much. We need to go inside so we can finish this properly," she grinned.

Andy crooked his elbow for her to snake her arm through and led them to the house as dignifiedly as possible with a semi hard-on.

Sharon addressed her team, giving orders and making a point of making eye-contact with Provenza. He grew impossibly redder with each glance and Sharon couldn't help but feel gleeful that she and Andy had managed to sort the old coot out. She grinned sweetly at her team, deciding on one more punishment for Provenza.

" . . . and Lieutenant Flynn and Detective Sanchez, head down to ballistics and see what we've got, Provenza, you're with me, we'll go have a little chat with Mrs. Cohen."

She saw the old man's breath hitch and a gulp travel down his throat. Payback really _was _a bitch.

* * *

_A/N: Okay guys, this is __**definitely **__the end of it! No more messages about a sequel please :) But still totally feel free to send prompts either through or through my tumblr: bloodrunsatmidnight. _


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